Tag: StoryTime

Mr Moran ‘s Break – Writing challenge Level 4

This writing is probably the most uncoordinated writing I’ve ever wrote.
Besides that, this story was pretty good. This here is my writing task for today. Have a read through and see if you can find anything you could change. If so then please write it in the comments!

A loud knock fills the silence in the room. “Um, excuse me Russell.” Russell turns his swivel chair to see who’s there. “May I take the day off today, (cough)” Um, I have to clean my um, window with uh, Ajax that window cleaner.” I’m pretty sure that it’s not for windows.” Russell replys. “You know that you can just ask to go -like a normal person, you don’t have to lie.” Russell responds. “Shots.” Mr Moran leaves in a rush, almost falling over the door stopper. “Good old Mr Moran.” Russell mumbles under his breath.

Mr Moran dashes through the parking lot in a hurry, before starting up his car and driving off. As he speeds through the Point England gates he brushes his hair back looking in the rear view mirror. Minutes go by and nervousness travels through his body. A bead of sweat slides down his face leaving a wet trail behind.

What felt like a 2 hour drive, Mr Moran had finally made it to his stop. It was the latest, coolest, most popular diner in town. McDonalds supreme! It was a 10 story building with multiple windows covering it. It was basically a glass building! Mr Moran hops out of the car and rushes in the building. Huge men in black suits stood by the door pushing Mr Moran away. The body guards went from strong scary people to very scared weak people as they realised the badge Mr Moran had. It read:

The Maccas King

Mr Moran was secretly the Maccas king! Mr Moran pushed through the guards and through the doors and to those that were just beside the receptionist. Little before you knew he was already at the top of the building. The view was phenomenal! Mr Moran rushed to table 79 and took a seat next to the curved window side. “Mr Moran!” yells the chief “Here is your big mac deluxe!” A big mac the size of his head sits on the table top for Mr Moran to demolish.